December 06, 2014 – 01:27pm in Gemini – Long Night’s Moon – Cleansing: Letting go of the old in order to gain strength to hive the new
As if time didn’t existed this year, that’s how I feel writing the last Full Moon’s Time-map of this year. There’s a certain melancholy to the knowing that another year has passed. A year in which so much has happened taking me from Himmelhoch jauchzend to zum Tode betrübt. I think to everybody this was a year of preparation to get ready to take off in a new direction or on a more advanced level. Now every preparation comes with hard work, diligent practice, discipline and tons of despair about facing your own limitations whether they be in your mind or on a more physical level. Right now is the time to let go of these preparations in order to let the future unfold itself. An athlete who has been prepping for a major, major race, now finally showing up at the start, knows that he has to let go of the burden of all this prepping. Releasing it from his mind, freeing himself from it to be able to be fully in the present moment, to gather all attention, energy and concentration to answer what is to come.
This Full Moon invites you to do exactly that: letting go of what has led you to being in the position and state you are in right now, in order to gain enough momentum to kickstart off the new. So on one hand this energy asks you to step into the insecurity of being fully open to a new version of yourself, while at the same time experiencing the pain of your old version that is dying. You could call this a moment of crisis, a final test whether or not you are able to survive at a moment in time where all you feel is separation from everything you’ve relied on and that has formed and shaped you so far; letting go of everything you derived security from, letting go of both thought and emotional patterns that shaped your identity.
Stepping up a next level of self-realization and individuation demands a willingness of initiating yourself into the deeper places of pain that are a hinderance for new development and at the same time an unconscious driving force behind all of your actions. Owning your pain, owning your despair, owning your insecurity frees the power these emotions hold over you, enabling you to integrate them and transform them into a more useful asset.
So, you’ve done the work. Did your exercises. Spent time meditating. Researched your inner depths. Focused on the good things to happen. Embraced your enemies. Controlled your addictions. Softened your harsh convictions. Opened your heart (really opened your heart) to the love of your life. Surrendered yourself to the knowing that you don’t know. And now, all you have to do is let go of just all of that and know that you (that is your little you) are not in control. Only your soul knows where she wants to go, where she wants to be, what she wants to do next. And maybe that is nothing.
This Full Moon invites you to let go off:
▪All the prepping you’ve done that gave you the impression that you are in control of your life and of everything else.
▪All the bits and pieces that are secure to you and that help you to hold your identity in place. Wether that is your car, your relationship, or the social position you’ve taken on.
▪All the self undermining thought patterns that also help you to hold your identity in place and at the same time prevent anything new to come in.
▪All the mechanisms you’ve created that keep you from being truly present in your heart. The only place where you can meet your soul and connect with her.
Now it’s time to heal your connection with your heart and through that with your soul. Nothing more.
Wishing you all a Merry Christmas!